Bullies
When I was a kid, every grade seemed to have a bully, often a large boy with thick fists who didn't do well in school. Small for my age, I saw many of them up close. I was told to stand up to bullies -- essentially cowards -- or suck it up. (I got larger friends.)
Schoolyard bullies, it seems, eventually get jobs. According to a recent story, almost 50% of American workers have been bullied or witnessed a coworker being bullied. The Workplace Bullying Institute defines the behavior as:
- Verbal abuse
- Offensive conduct/behaviors (including nonverbal) which are threatening, humiliating or intimidating
- Work interference – sabotage – which prevents work from getting done
That's a broad brush. But the problem is real. Health effects include obsessing about work, skyrocketing blood pressure, "mental health" days off, days off spent listless and exhausted, and feelings of guilt and anxiety. A recent article in the journal Sleep links bullying to insomnia, even for observers. And if you think the recent economic crisis is an excuse for employers to fire their bullies, guess again, according to a recent survey.
So, it seems my parents and teachers were correct: bullies are everywhere. Chances are, you have a few at work. And while you may have been told to suck it up as a kid, you're an adult. Here's a few suggestions:
- If possible, confront the bully in a professional manner. Stay calm and do not threaten. A bully will want you to lose control.
- Do your job and do it well. Remember, a bully wants you to fail.
- Make sure your superiors are aware of your work.
- Don't try to win others to your side. Your actions will speak louder.
- Don't allow the bully to isolate you from workplace friends.
Easy to say. It's one thing to read "don't be intimidated" and quite another to face subtle torture day in and day out. Be honest about what is happening and don't allow the bully to control your actions. When all else fails, consult your Human Resources department.