Hold the Attitude, Please....
Spring has sprung, finally. Thanks to the lovely Norovirus, this winter was brutal. Incapacitating vomiting with diarrhea took out practically everyone I know. With the abolition of diversion, frequent sick calls, and a super long winter, we in the ER were pushed to the limit.
But, with a new season, comes a new outlook, so I thought. Nicer weather generally brings out the happier side of people. Fewer patients come in to be seen, leading to a less hectic environment. Stress levels decline and we all get along better.
Every year, I survive nasty winters knowing that it will end, so I was taken off guard when one day last week a staff member verbally attacked me. I was working in triage. It can be a rather hectic place at times, but that day was moderate. I kept a calm pace and prided myself on doing a good job. Apparently, I forgot to chart a medication I had been given. (This is a problem. I know that and I would be happy to remedy it, even apologize for it, if it had been brought to my attention appropriately. Unfortunately, it did not unfold that way.)
She stormed into triage, her arms crossed and glared at me until I stepped away from the patient I was triaging. She proceeded to blast me with her apparent frustrations. Yes, I was wrong. Yes, I should pay better attention. But, no, I didn’t respond that way. In fact, I waved her off and walked away. I didn’t have the time or the tolerance to deal with her.
This incident troubled me. Normally, this person is a very outgoing, hardworking and friendly co-worker. What was her goal this time? Maybe she needed to unload or share her misery. But she really didn’t accomplish anything, except anger me.
Let me stop right there. Could I have accomplished something? Maybe, if I had stepped out of the moment. When I think about it now, my apathy during the situation is just as bad. I accepted that behavior when, in fact, I should have corrected it. As colleagues, we should never talk to each other like that. Maybe my indifference was less juvenile than responding with snide remarks, but not as respectable as redirecting could have been.
This leads me to think about my children. If either one of them ever talked to me like that, I wouldn’t ignore it; I would make them rephrase the comment with a better tone. Could I do this professionally? Maybe, but it would have to be slightly different. After all, I can’t control the way someone approaches me. I can only decide how I react to it.
So the next time someone tries to sideswipe me, I am going to think of it from a leadership perspective. I’ll just have to leave out what I say at home: “Try again, and hold the attitude please.” Or maybe that might just work….