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The Busy PT's Guide to Finding Balance

Facing Fear

Published December 2, 2008 12:41 PM by Janey Goude
My daughter and I go on a date once a month and talk about issues that relate to transitioning into womanhood. It is an evening we both treasure. This month our topic was on courage. 

We began our date with a self defense class. The instructor explained that 75% of defense is prevention-good posture, good eye contact and walking with purpose down the middle of the sidewalk all say, "I'm not a victim.  Don't mess with me."  The rest of the evening was spent learning maneuvers that could free us from an attacker's grip.  Let's just say my daughter is now the one to be feared walking down a dark alley!

Over the course of the evening, our conversation centered on summoning courage to act wisely in the midst of fear. The book we are using offered an interesting perspective on fear, one I had never considered:

Fear is an acknowledgment that something-or someone-has power over us. We're not afraid of a teacup poodle, but we're afraid of a pit bull. The difference is how we've assessed their power over us. A pit bull can hurt us.  A teacup poodle is just cute."

(from Queen Esther's Secrets of Womanhood by Ginger Garrett, p. 95)

What do you fear? What have you acknowledged as having power over you? Does it truly have power over you or is your fear irrational?

Because of the tools we learned at the self defense class, our fear has been lessened. Knowledge is power.  Since we now possess the ability to escape the clutches of an attacker, his power over us is neutralized.  We feel empowered rather than powerless.

What actions can you take to increase your knowledge, thereby lessening the grip of fear in your life?

3 comments

When I was about 19 years old, my family lived in a new subdivision, the streets were not paved yet.  I rode a bus to work. One day After work, I was bringing home a large birthday cake, my purse and was wearing high heals.  As I proceeded down one street, half way down, a large bull dog came up to me barking.  I was so scared but I kept eye contact with him, talking with pretended calmness.  I could almost feel his breath. I wasn't watching where I was going because I was looking him in the eye.  Finally he turned around and went back to his home.  I looked around  and saw he had veered me off the path into a huge field far past where I was to turn into the woods to get to my home.  I was so proud I didn't panic  and he didn't bite me. If I hadn't had that cake, i might have tried to run and who knows what might have happened? I think perhaps the difference in size is what makes the difference between the two examples of dogs.  I was more intimidated by the big dog.

Nalley Osland, Retired December 3, 2008 3:32 PM
Lexington SC

Another great article!%0d%0a%0d%0aWOW!!!  A self-defense class??  Maybe we DO have the same genes!  I am proud that you took her there...   %0d%0a%0d%0aCourage taps into perception about as much as Thankfulness.  You are so right!!!%0d%0a%0d%0a(But you didn't have to use the "Pit Bull" example!!  They always get a bad rap!)   :-)%0d%0a%0d%0aThe other thing she has that will aid her is her keen perception of others.  She is extremely perceptive and that will give her many red flags or "heads up" along the way!!

Julie December 3, 2008 2:48 PM

Next time I stand before an audience to speak I'll remember: good posture, good eye contact, walk with purpose.

The funny thing is that I'm always telling my kids, "Walk like you have a purpose in life."

Bonita December 3, 2008 12:11 PM

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