Bringing Balance to our Good Intentions
"The best laid plans of mice and men..." I do have some well laid plans! I'm a planner. I love to plan. But sometimes I get stuck in the planning stage.
Like the perpetual college student, I can be the perpetual planner. If I'm being totally honest, sometimes planning is an excuse to avoid doing. When I'm afraid of failing, I hesitate to begin a project until all of my plans are secure.
Other times I just don't want to do the task. So, I tell myself I'm being productive by planning. Some might call that lying...I prefer the term procrastination.
The problem with procrastination, whether born out of fear or disinterest, is that it consumes time and energy that could be used productively for other projects.
The best way to bring balance to our good intentions is to be honest about our intentions. If you don't want to do something, own up to that. It is easy for me to get stuck in a people pleasing mode. The problem is if I tell someone I will do something that I really don't want to do, I'm going to frustrate them. Better to tell them up front that I have no interest. Then they can find someone who will do the task with enthusiasm and on time!
If you are afraid of failure, confide in a friend. Get moral support. Just saying your fear out loud to someone else takes some of fear's power away. Think back to times when you've been afraid. Most of what we fear never comes to pass. Recently I pulled an all-nighter - not the same experience at 43 as it was at 17! I procrastinated on an assignment that intimidated me. Once I began the research, everything fell together beautifully. If I had taken action sooner, I would have found my fears were without merit. I would have saved days of fret and avoided a sleepless night!
"You gain strength, courage and confidence
by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face...
You must do the thing you think you cannot do."
- Eleanor Roosevelt