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The Busy PT's Guide to Finding Balance

Listen - Think - Speak

Published September 21, 2010 4:15 PM by Janey Goude

Several years ago I implemented a strategy in my marriage, or rather I asked my husband to implement it. I realized the majority of our arguments were sparked because I would present a situation and he would feel the need to immediately respond. Many times the response was not an accurate reflection of his desired outcome. So I began prefacing a discussion with, "You don't have to respond to this now. Take time to think about how you would like to handle it." Sometimes it might be a day or two before we talked about the situation again. Removing the pressure he was putting on himself to give an immediate reply brought a positive change in our interactions.

I don't do as well with my children. Often I am the one giving an immediate response without thinking. I'll answer, "Yes" to a request, only to find out we have a conflict. While an adult would understand, the eyes of a child are able to see only a broken promise. Children lack the logic to comprehend such an honest mistake. So, I'm trying to take my own advice and "think about how I would like to handle it."

In your workplace, are you the one who is quick to react, often regretting the words that come tumbling out? Do you react quickly to some, but respond thoughtfully to others? Watch your reactions this week. Practice "Listen - Think - Speak" (in that order!) and watch the transformations that take place.

4 comments

Darlyn, Thanks for your comment.  I'm glad you enjoyed.

Janey Goude September 28, 2010 10:53 AM

Great blog...so true and a wonderful lesson.

Darlyn September 27, 2010 9:59 AM
SC

Dean,

Appreciate the comment.  Like you, I'm a work in progress on this matter.  I think this is an area where I'll die trying, as the saying goes.  Doubt I'll ever get it perfectly mastered.  

Janey Goude September 24, 2010 12:36 AM

Ah Janey, you have touched upon the big difference between reacting and responding. Reacting gets me into trouble, responding calms the waters. I'm getting better at practicing the former, not perfect yet but working on it.

Dean

Dean Metz September 21, 2010 11:01 PM

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